A Note to my Reader:
I have been choosing excerpts from The Daimon, (my story in progress), to share with my images, while preparing my internal world for my show. Pray Tell of Things to Come, a multi-media show, is on display at Orr St. Studios in Columbia, Missouri, until March 12. For local readers, my reception is Wednesday, Febraury 29, (leap day) from 5:00-6:30 p.m.
An Excerpt from The Daimon:
It was an ugly demon that took Der Junge’s life. It was the raging silence that had given the demon’s devouring nature a place to grow strong, to destroy Elisabeth’s ancestor. It had taken the shape of illness. Of consumption. Coughing, coughing blood, lots of blood.
Elisabeth would be forever thankful for Viola being her vigilant companion; she helped keep the demons at bay while encouraging Elisabeth to speak her peace.
Early August 1994:
Despair is the demon that lives within me. I would hear its thunder while lying in my crib at night until I was three or four. Thump, thump, thump—dump. The metered beat of my heart murmuring, rang loudly in my ears, as I drifted to sleep. Bringing fear and despair when I could not calm its pace and volume. I feared my own existence.
Der Junge was not afraid that the boat workers would discover that she was a female. She had become the identity of her name. Although, they might not see her as “the boy,” Der Junge didn’t care. She would do anything to be free of Johann. His despair was driving her mad. Ironically, it was Der Junge’s silence that would destroy her, but it also saved her from the wrath of a drunken father. With no contention, Johann’s rageful fists never touched Der Junge. Instead, they busted the chairs she had crafted. That’s when Der Junge took to pulling barges up the Volga River.
“She’s shy!” Momma would say, generations later, to camouflage the awkwardness of Elisabeth’s gulps of air that responded to a question from a well-meaning adult.
I spent my waking hours in solitude (with Viola of course), padding around barefooted until my feet were caked with dirt. The Prairie dirt validated my existence. It gave me an identity. I was silent but I was a Prairie girl.
“In this lifetime, I will learn to speak my peace!” The Daimon constantly reminds Elisabeth of her soul’s commitment. Her yoga teacher would show Elisabeth how to do the Kali breath of the Hindu Goddess of Destruction, Slayer of Demons, Mistress of the Universe.